Updates and Rambling
Aw dang. Was this the stuff I was supposed to keep secret?
5.03.2011
GEEZ WITH THE DREAMS
Tunnel
To see a tunnel in your dream, represents the vagina, womb, and birth. Thus it may refer to a need for security and nurturance.
To dream that you are going through a tunnel, suggests that you are exploring aspects of your unconscious. You are opening yourself to a brand new awareness. Alternatively, it indicates your limited perspective as in the phrase "tunnel vision". Are you being close minded or narrow minded in some issue?
To see the light at the end of a tunnel, symbolizes hope. You will navigate through life and all its difficulties with great success. Alternatively, it also indicates the end of your journey and the realization of your goals.
Library
To dream that you are in a library, signifies your search for knowledge and your hunger for ideas. You may be trying to seek out new meanings to life. You need to study and evaluate your situation before taking action. If the library is disorganized, then it suggests that too much information is coming at you at the same time. You are having difficulty sorting it all out.
To dream that you cannot find a book in the library or that the book you are looking for is already checked out, suggests that a certain aspect of your self is lacking enrichment or is under developed.
To see a library in your dream, symbolizes the knowledge you have accumulated over the years.
Children
To see children in your dream, signify an aspect of yourself and your childlike qualities. You may be retreating back to a childlike state and longing for the past. You are trying to still satisfy repressed desires and unfulfilled hopes. Perhaps there is something that you need to see grow and nurture. Take some time off and cater to the inner child within. Alternatively, the dream may be highlighting your innocence, purity, simplicity, and carefree attitude. If you are fighting with children, then it implies that you are repressing your inner child. The children could represent someone in your waking life (coworker, mate, sibling, etc.) who is acting like a child. If you see children fighting in your dream, then it means that your sense of morality and character are in conflict.
4.27.2011
Dream
To see an aquarium in your dream, signifies that you have acknowledged your emotions but have not yet confronted them. Thus, it may refer to your unconscious thoughts or repressed sexual desires. Also, you may feel that your life is going nowhere or that you feel it is going in circles. Alternatively, the aquarium may indicate that you need to calm down and set some time for yourself to relax and unwind.
seahorse (clear):
To see a sea horse in your dream, represents the power of your unconscious. You have a new perspective or different outlook in life. If the sea horse is invisible, then it suggests that there is an emotional issue that you are not acknowledging or recognizing.
catfish:
To see a catfish in your dream, symbolizes someone who may not appear to be who they are. Their true self may not be obvious or immediately apparent.
turtle:
To see a turtle in your dream, symbolizes wisdom, faithfulness, longevity, and loyalty. It also suggests that you need to take it slow in some situation or relationship in your life. With time and patience, you will make steady progress. Alternatively, a turtle indicates that you are sheltering yourself from the realities of life. You are putting forth a hard exterior and not letting others in. As a result, you are feeling withdrawn.
The dream:
I was with my best friend in her apartment and there was a huge aquarium. Something was wrong with it, so I tried to take some of the animals in there to another safe place. I was able to save a catfish, a see-through sea horse, and a turtle.
2.15.2011
Oh, My Life.
Work:
BUSY. I'm on the board for 42 hours a week now. Which is "a whole freaking LOT" for a massage therapist. I would probably die if I did 42 hours of massage a week, but I'm averaging 15-20, which isn't bad at all. And financially, this has been a most excellent decision.
Church:
I'm a CTR 5 teacher, which is wonderful. I love my kids. I have one little girl that is now my Sacrament Meeting Lap Warmer. Hahahaha. She sits on my lap all through Sacrament and goes through the pictures on my phone. She's figured out a touchscreen phone pretty dang well. Good girl. All my kids are a riot; I've learned that no matter how prepared I am for the lesson to teach, it will NEVER happen as planned.
Dance:
I dance 5 hours a week now, 4 ballet and 1 jazz. It's been such a delicious activity. Dancing in The Nutcracker with the BRT in December was such a blast. I'd love to keep performing with them. I take classes at La Mesa as well. It's been wicked challenging adapting ballet technique between the two studios, and adjusting the training mentality that differs so much, but I like it. A most welcome challenge.
Misc.:
I now know how to change the battery in my car. I know this sounds like a mean feat, but it's stumped a few people, so I'm quite pleased with myself. Apparently a PT Cruiser is tougher than your average car to deal with. At any rate, I can do it. WOOHOO!
Misc. x2:
My little brother comes home from his mission in 15 months. I can't believe he's already been gone for 9; it feels like he left just last week. I miss the dickens out of him.
That's about it.
8.07.2010
OMG Dream Interpreter
I dreamed that I was at church and went into the women’s restroom. I was going to wash my hands when I saw the sink was plugged up with paper towels. So I pull the towels out of the drain and throw them away.
Sink: To see a sink in your dream, represents your feelings and your ability to control your emotions. You may need to cleanse yourself of past feelings and start fresh. Consider also the common phrase "everything but the kitchen sink" which refers to a situation where you have almost everything that you can possible want or need. The symbol may also be a pun on "sinking" or drowning.
Paper Towel: To see or use a paper towel in your dream, suggests that you are experiencing some temporary setbacks. You need to quickly clean up your past issues before you can move forward with your life.
After I threw the towels away, I noticed that some weeds were growing out of the drain, so I pulled them out.
Weeds: To dream that you are weeding, suggests that you need to rid yourself of the negativity in your life in order to move on and grow as a person. It is time to release past grudges and build on future relationships.
Some of the weeds were tangled up with bed sheets that we use at work for massage.
Sheets: To notice or buy bedspread in your dream, represents your open sexuality and outward beauty. The design and look of the bedspread may be a clue into what you are looking for sexually.
So after I finished with that, I went on a run up Montano. I wasn’t able to run continuously like I used to; I ran a little ways, then walked. I was in sand and barefoot, so it was difficult but enjoyable.
Running: To dream that you are running alone, refers to your determination and motivation in the pursuit of your goals. You will find success and rise above those around you. Alternatively, the dream may mean that you need to hurry up in making a decision.
Barefoot: To dream that you are barefoot, represents your playful attitudes and relaxed, carefree frame of mind. Alternatively, being barefoot indicates poverty, lack of mobility, or misunderstanding. You have low self-esteem and lack confidence in yourself. Or you may be dealing with issues concerning your self-identity. You are unprepared for what is ahead for you.
As I was running, I got caught up in a crowd of excessively fat people. They were stampeding, but weren’t able to really run, so I was tripping over them.
Fat: To dream that others are fat, signifies prosperity. Consider also the phrase "it ain't over till the fat lady sings" and how you need to wait for the final result and not assume the outcome.
I managed to break free of them, and noticed that they were filming a commercial for Quizno’s. I was annoyed at the use of fat people for a fast-food commercial. At any rate, I continued to run up Montano, but I wasn’t in sand anymore, but on the road. It wasn’t as comfortable, but I carried on. One of the guys from the commercial comes riding up in a golf cart. And tries to hit on me, but I run down the street and find myself in front of the state fair.
Entwined in that dream was the past history of me picking up stray animals. At one point, a lady was riding a bicycle next to me, saying that she felt well enough to go back home. I answered her, “That’s fine. You’re the weirdest stray I’ve ever picked up.” She’d been hurt when I found her while running and had taken her home to get her better.
Stray: To dream that you adopt or take in a stray animals, indicate that you are wallowing in your loneliness.
Weird.
8.04.2010
7.23.2010
Cutting Out the Cancer.
If you could combine Willoughby and Henry Crawford into a single passive-aggressive body, you would get what I am no longer associating with.
Liberating. I just worry about the girl he's latched onto. Sure, he's probably awful sweet to her now, but he was awful sweet in our beginning, too. I'm more disgusted with him than I care for her happiness, as she was once a dear friend of mine. Oh well. I only see them once a week and they're too busy oogling each other every chance they can that it's not too hard for me to avoid interaction with them.
I really hope, for her sake, that he grows a pair and a spine for this girl. Lord knows he wouldn't for me. But then, I like MEN. One day he'll be one. I hope.
ANYHOW!!! All is wonderful in my world. Going back home has been so great. I've added hours at Envy and it is going so well. Who'da thunk that the key to money making is working? Weird. Plus, bonus: I have a new manager and she is AMAZING.
I'm taking ballet again. And Jazz. I've missed dancing so much, it's wonderful to be back in the studio. When I went up to the barre, it was like seeing an old friend I hadn't realized I'd missed so much. Bittersweet.
I'm also now a CTR 6 teacher. BEST CALLING EVER. I LOVE it! You don't even understand how thrilled I am at this. I was a CTR 6 teacher when I was down at NMSU, and when I came home, they stuck me in Nursery. I pretty much wanted to commit suicide every week. I would pray on the way to church that I would get into an accident, or I'd get sick, or something horrible would happen so I didn't have to go anymore. And that's why I started going to the Single's Ward. Lesson learned, don't go to the Single's Ward, just ask to be released. Hahahaha, at any rate, I'm in Primary, which I LOVE. This is so stinkin' great. You don't even know.
And I've been called as an Enrichment committee chair. That's cool, I guess.
I'm so busy having so much fun FINALLY. I have a LIFE now. Sure, it doesn't involve any snivelers my age, but that is so totally fine. I don't miss 'em much. Haley, yes. A few kids here and there, maybe, but not enough. I LOVE life again. I'm surrounded by good, decent, honest people that want the best for me and do everything they can to help me, as I do all I can to help them. Life is GOOD.
Oh, and my two co-worker BFFs, Marty and Tamorah (omg, real names!) are dancing with me. They are auditioning with two different studios for their productions of The Nutcracker and have decided I'm doing it, too. This should be fun.
In a month or so, I'm also deliberating over joining the Tap class, too. I used to tap when I was much younger and I really liked it. I think I'll have a go. I LOVE dancing again.
I had to give it up when I was in middle school because I was presented with a choice: dance or music. Clearly, a decision was made. But now I'm in such circumstances as I can afford both. :) Oh happy day.
6.23.2010
Ugh... Wee!!!! ....Ugh.... Weeeee!
WEE!!! I pay less rent so I can save money to go to Peru and pick up my little brother in two years.
Ugh... I'm living with my parents.
WEEEEE! I'm paying less rent.
6.10.2010
I should really go to bed when i plan to
Today: Dresden Dolls - Amanda Palmer - Evelyn Evelyn
coin operated boy
coin operated boy
sitting on the shelf he is just a toy
but i turn him on and he comes to life
automatic joy
that is why i want a coin operated boy
made of plastic and elastic
he is rugged and long-lasting
who could ever ever ask for more
love without complications galore
many shapes and weights to choose from
i will never leave my bedroom
i will never cry at night again
wrap my arms around him and pretend....
coin operated boy
all the other real ones that i destroy
cannot hold a candle to my new boy and i'll
never let him go and i'll never be alone
not with my coin operated boy......
this bridge was written to make you feel smittener
with my sad picture of girl getting bitterer
can you extract me from my plastic fantasy
i didnt think so but im still convinceable
will you persist even after i bet you
a billion dollars that i'll never love you
will you persist even after i kiss you
goodbye for the last time
will you keep on trying to prove it?
i'm dying to lose it...
i want it
i want you
i want a coin operated boy.
and if i had a star to wish on
for my life i cant imagine
any flesh and blood could be his match
i can even take him in the bath
coin operated boy
he may not be real experienced with girls
but i know he feels like a boy should feel
isnt that the point that is why i want a
coin operated boy
with his pretty coin operated voice
saying that he loves me that hes thinking of me
straight and to the point
that is why i want
a coin operated boy.
copyright 2002 amanda palmer
6.02.2010
Bad Translator. Thanks, Heather.
...54 translations later we get:
"When necessary, we hope, very lucky. I think so."
http://www.conveythis.com/translation.php
"I often find myself loving people more devotedly and fiercely than they could ever possibly return. Which is how I end up with a shattered heart so often, and they have no idea."
...54 translations later we get:
"They are very happy. It is not good."
"Hey there. I like your hair. Who does your hair? I want to go there."
...54 translations later we get:
"Hi, I am Delighted to help your hair? Female"
"I love you."
...54 translations later we get:
""I love you."
AFRIKAANS : Ek is lief vir jou.
Back to ENGLISH : I love you.
ALBANIAN : I love you.
Back to ENGLISH : I love you.
ARABIC : أحبك.
Back to ENGLISH : I love you.
BELARUSIAN : Я люблю цябе.
Back to ENGLISH : I love you.
BULGARIAN : Аз те обичам.
Back to ENGLISH : I love you.
CATALAN : T'estimo.
Back to ENGLISH : I love you.
CHINESE : 我爱你。
Back to ENGLISH : I love you.
CHINESE_SIMPLIFIED : 我爱你。
Back to ENGLISH : I love you.
CHINESE_TRADITIONAL : 我愛你。
Back to ENGLISH : I love you.
CROATIAN : I love you.
Back to ENGLISH : I love you.
CZECH : Miluji tě.
Back to ENGLISH : I love you.
DANISH : Jeg elsker dig.
Back to ENGLISH : I love you.
DUTCH : Ik hou van je.
Back to ENGLISH : I love you.
ENGLISH : I love you.
Back to ENGLISH : I love you.
ESTONIAN : Ma armastan sind.
Back to ENGLISH : I love you.
FILIPINO : Mahal kita.
Back to ENGLISH : I love you.
FINNISH : Rakastan sinua.
Back to ENGLISH : I love you.
FRENCH : Je t'aime.
Back to ENGLISH : I love you.
GALICIAN : Quérote.
Back to ENGLISH : I love you.
GERMAN : Ich liebe dich.
Back to ENGLISH : I love you.
GREEK : Σ 'αγαπώ.
Back to ENGLISH : I love you.
HEBREW : אני אוהבת אותך.
Back to ENGLISH : I love you.
HINDI : मैं तुम्हें प्यार करता हूँ.
Back to ENGLISH : I love you.
HUNGARIAN : Szeretlek.
Back to ENGLISH : I love you.
ICELANDIC : Ég elska þig.
Back to ENGLISH : "I love you.
INDONESIAN : "Aku mencintaimu.
Back to ENGLISH : "I love you.
IRISH : "Is tú mo ghrá.
Back to ENGLISH : "I love you.
ITALIAN : "Ti amo.
Back to ENGLISH : "I love you.
JAPANESE : "私はあなたを愛して。
Back to ENGLISH : "I love you.
KOREAN : "당신을 사랑합니다.
Back to ENGLISH : "I love you.
LATVIAN : "Es mīlu tevi.
Back to ENGLISH : "I love you.
LITHUANIAN : "Aš tave myliu.
Back to ENGLISH : "I love you.
MACEDONIAN : "Те сакам.
Back to ENGLISH : "I love you.
MALAY : "Aku mencintaimu.
Back to ENGLISH : "I love.
MALTESE : "I love.
Back to ENGLISH : "I love.
NORWEGIAN : "Jeg elsker.
Back to ENGLISH : "I love.
PERSIAN : "من عشق است.
Back to ENGLISH : "I love.
POLISH : "Kocham.
Back to ENGLISH : "I love.
PORTUGUESE : "Eu te amo.
Back to ENGLISH : "I love you.
ROMANIAN : "Te iubesc.
Back to ENGLISH : "I love you.
RUSSIAN : "Я люблю тебя.
Back to ENGLISH : "I love you.
SERBIAN : "Волим те.
Back to ENGLISH : "I love you.
SLOVAK : "Milujem ťa.
Back to ENGLISH : "I love you.
SLOVENIAN : "Ljubim te.
Back to ENGLISH : "I love you.
SPANISH : "Te amo.
Back to ENGLISH : "I love you.
SWAHILI : "I love you.
Back to ENGLISH : "I love you.
SWEDISH : "Jag älskar dig.
Back to ENGLISH : "I love you.
TAGALOG : "Mahal kita.
Back to ENGLISH : "I love you.
THAI : "ฉันรักคุณ
Back to ENGLISH : "I love you.
TURKISH : "Seni seviyorum.
Back to ENGLISH : "I love you.
UKRAINIAN : "Я люблю тебе.
Back to ENGLISH : "I love you.
VIETNAMESE : "Tôi yêu bạn.
Back to ENGLISH : "I love you.
WELSH : "Rwyf wrth fy modd i chi.
Back to ENGLISH : "I love you.
YIDDISH : "איך ליבע איר.
Back to ENGLISH : "I love you.
5.12.2010
Done. Let's sing it together! Nyeah nyeah n-nyeah nyeah!
A big hand goes out to all my friends that came and let me train them. Most met their goals and that is FLIPPING AWESOME. For the ones that didn't... well... that sucks.
I, for one, lost no weight whatsoever. In fact, I gained. All that big talk of mine in January about phases and training schedules and whatnot was a load of tosh. I'll be a loser and blame school, and since school is over now I'll get my rear back in gear. I'm going to continue my laziness for the rest of this week (and by that I mean I'll sleep in tomorrow, too) and then next week start the AM workouts at the gym. Oh, the good old days of my gym-junkie lifestyle of being at the gym at 5 AM... let's make it happen. Awwww yeah. With any luck, I'll become an addict and then nobody will ever see me except at the gym and it'll be a total shock for anyone to see me in anything other than workout clothes and all of my friends will have to have an intervention because they're worried about me and then I'll get on the Dr Phil show and everyone will cry and I'll say I want to change and I'm not happy, even though I actually love the life I'm living, and then I'll overdo it and die.
Or I can stop writing in run-on sentences. That'd be really cool, too.
But the good news is that my body fat percentage is 20. Which is in the fatter end of athletic. So yay! When I first got assessed in January, my bf% was 24, which is Overweight. Now I'm Athletic. Nice. And all my tests have been done by professional bodybuilders, so you can believe the numbers they give you because their livelihood depends on it. So there.
So. With that: I should be getting off to work now. Things are picking up. I keep getting "the talking to" from my boss about how I need to sell more and advertise better and "get myself out there" so I can "reap greater rewards" [i.e. they'll make more money off me] and I smile, nod, say "okay" and then go back to what I'm doing. Things are picking up because what I've been doing has WORKED. Not being pushy, being friendly, and laying off the intense used-car-salesman approach.
Seriously, in all honestly, I'm not going to whore out my work the way everyone there thinks I should. I'm not going to tell people they NEED a massage when they don't want one. I'm not going to claim I can cure/mend/fix/regenerate/resolve anything, but I CAN share my success stories of previous clients. If you have frozen shoulder, I'm not going to tell you I can fix it for you, but I will tell you that I've helped a woman regain mobility with her frozen shoulder. I will be more than willing to help you and break down scar tissue, but I will not promise 100% miracles (even though that's pretty much what I've been able to do). I don't like it. I'm not pushy like that. I hate it when people do it to me.